2.9 Arjun’s intense conflict

• Translation

  Sanjay said: Having thus spoken, Gudakesh, that chastiser of enemies, addressed Hrishikesh: “Govind, I shall not fight,” and became silent.

Arjun’s intense breakdown is a ‘final fight’. At its lowest point, it is a battle within him between the good Arjun and not good Arjun. When the internal conflict becomes louder and louder. Now what? When the conflict is at the loudest, he becomes silent.

तूष्णीं बभूव ह; tooshneem babhoova ha; he became silent

He is not at a crossroad. At a crossroad, one has a choice between one path and many others. Arjun is, however, walking on a razor's edge. Razor’s edge is walking one path that is sharp with a very narrow line of sight. His path is decided by his duty as a soldier and Krishna will make sure he follows through on his duty (spoiler alert - conclusion of Geeta). There are not many paths for Arjun but only one path. The path will have many methods (spoiler alert - the many Yogas that Krishna explains to Arjun in Geeta).

It is quite interesting that Arjun is a soldier. I wonder what is the mindset of a soldier in a battle. There are no good options - you will kill or get killed. It is said that “there are no atheists in a foxhole”. Arjun seems to have come to his foxhole. The foxhole provides you with a bit of shelter and refuge. I imagine the world becoming smaller and smaller in a foxhole. What he contemplates in that foxhole will determine if he is able to dig himself out of that hole and fight. Welcome to your foxhole, Arjun.

He perhaps knows in his heart that there is no running away. He knows he has tried every single argument to defend his reasons to not fight. He also knows that those reasons are faulty. He finally admits he is afraid (2.7: कार्पण्य + दोषो + उपहत + स्वभाव:; kārpaṇya + doṣho + upahata + svabhāvaḥ; a mental state overwhelmed with cowardice). However, the ‘die has been cast’. It is a point of no return. He signed up for this righteous war. If he runs away from his duty, he will not only hurt himself but put everyone on his side (the Pandavas) in peril. There will be no redemption from that.

His silence should not be underestimated. It is a silent and perhaps a deafening cry for help. A moment when he hits bottom. It is an irony that he chooses to be silent when the conflict within him is the loudest. His silence seems to be loudly saying that he does not know what to do. Too many times in situations like this we likely do the opposite. We become loud, very loud. Perhaps, there is something to learn from that. Silence might be a step towards sitting with an intense emotion that is hard to resolve. Sit with silence - that’s what our hero Arjun does. He does not know what to do.

If this was a play, I would imagine the curtain drawing on Act 1 with melancholic music and silence.

Arjun’s healing can now begin.

EASY VERSE in Sanskrit with Translation

#	Easy Verse	Transliteration	Translation
	सञ्जय उवाच	Sanjaya Uvaacha	Sanjaya said:
1	(एवम् + उक्त्वा) हृषीकेशं	Evam uktvaa Hrisheekesham	Having spoken thus to Hrishikesha (Krishna)
2	गुडाकेश: परन्तप	Gudakeshah parantapah	the “Conqueror of sleep” or “Destroyer of foes”
3	न योत्स्य इति (गोविन्दं + उक्त्वा)	na yotsya iti Govindam uktvaa	said to Govinda thus: “I will not fight!”
4	तूष्णीं बभूव ह	tooshneem babhoova ha	Saying this, he became silent.